Bye Bye!!

I'm off to the land of Swiss tomorrow, so no blogging for a week!!
Have a lovely New Years, and don't forget I am still accepting random gifts!

Pyjama Day (Or, The World Was Bad But Now It Is Okay Again)

Today I didn't get dressed and I didn't leave the house. Instead, I spent all day watching tv (I also did the washing up but only because I had to) in my pyjamas. Pyjama Days form an essential part of my life and I usually take one when I need recharging and/or feel shitty (both in this case). It helps when good things are on tv, but it doesn't really matter. From today I can remember bits of 'Made', 'Babe', 'Chicago' and I've just finished watching 'While You Were Sleeping'. I also talked to Mr. G. and I feel much better.
Except for the fact that while I was just checking there was nothing good on the other channels before going to bed, I saw my name on the screen and paused for a minute. My name is not all that common, even in Holland, and so I was curious. It turned out to be one of those sex line things. Apparently, if you text 'Merel' to some number, you get to listen in on some hot sex! Innit great?
Goodnight y'all!

Blegh

That's all, just Blegh.

Why Yes, I Am Still Alive!

I am sitting in my mum's study in my pyjamas (what's the point of getting dressed when it is so cold there's now way I'm going out?) trying to catch up on all my internet things.
I had a lovely time with Mr. G. in Germany and Harlow, his family has really accepted me and makes me feel so welcome! I even got to peel potatoes and make tea, so I felt much less like a guest, which is nice.
I am now in Holland (obviously), and need to phone people to make dates to see them, and do the washing up and organise my clothes, but I don't wanna. That's the latest in the land of Me.

Another Term Over....

So this is the end of the first term....
And I had my toughest Theory class tonight, but it was good.
I said goodbye to my new friends, and am now almost crying because I will miss them.
I have been crying a lot lately, but mostly at good things, and no huge crying fits, so all is good.
I am going to Germany with Mr. G. tomorrow evening, I can't wait!
I am terribly sleepy but will need to tidy my room and start packing so I can buy a present and catch my train to Harlow tomorrow morning.
It is such a relief for me that Mr. G.'s family seems to have completely accepted me, his mum has even offered me a lift to the airport next week and she's making sure I get a 'proper' Christmas dinner before I leave...
At the end of this term I feel like everything is coming together: I will be seeing my family who I miss so much, and I also know I have some really good (old and new) friends. I feel accepted and loved, by myself as much as by others. I have finally accepted that yes, I talk a lot, and people still like me and listen to me, and I should cut myself some slack every once in a while.
My life seems to make more sense from having been forced to live on my own properly for a while.
Still, thanks to you guys for being there for me and letting me figure stuff out on my own, I think I am finally ready to accept myself for who I am, and was, and will be.

Shameless Begging

Could someone please buy me any of the following:

- 'Sleeping Beauty' by Tina Schart Hyman (thank you Lovely Leni!)
- 'Grey's Anatomy' series One (and Two if that is on dvd yet) dvd set
- Any book by Paul Biegel, hardback, in Dutch, except 'De Tuinen van Dorr' (which I bought for myself today) and the 'Kleine Kapitein' series (which I am stealing from my mum)
- All the books on my reading lists for next term except 'Ronia the Robber's Daughter', 'The Curious Incident of the Dog at Night-Time' and 'The Cat in the Hat'
- 'The Best of Nina Simone Vol. 1 and 2'
- 'The Nightmare Before Christmas' dvd
- A complete and unabridged English (or Dutch) translation of 'Les Miserables'
- Some nice warm and pretty winter shoes or boots
- A white scarf and gloves Some nice brown gloves to match the lovely scarf Lizzy sent me
- A nice pair of earrings suitable for every day use (have to be real silver) (thanks Merel!)
- A nice necklace (same note as above) (thank you Mr G!)
- A good massage
- A copy of Annie M G Schmidt's fairy tales, in Dutch with drawings by Carl Hollander, not some other crappy illustrator (got this from the net with help from Mum)
- A light therapy device
- The 'Dirty Dancing' soundtrack
- Either 'Consumer Joe' or 'The Lost Blogs' by Paul Davidson

Thank you.

Pleh

Today I made a meal of Spring Greens (it's not spring! I don't get it!), Sausages and Mash. Twas most nice, especially the Mash. I think Mr. G. might be on to something with this whole cooking-is-nice thing, but sssshhhhhh don't tell him, because then he might stop cooking for me, and he does it so well...
For the rest: Pleh. Essay due Wednesday. No words typed as yet. Have loads of ideas, but have yet to figure out how they will apply to question. On to read Freud now. Woot.

What Is It With People?

I will never understand why people who are walking in a group of two or more on a path (pavement, cliffside, whatever) that is only wide enough for two, never walk behind each other when a person walking towards them needs to pass. Instead, the person who's on their own always needs to just squeeze themselves in the tiniest space possible, walk on the street, or wait for the others to pass. Am I weird or does that seem rude? I dunno, maybe I'm just an old lady, but I find it annoying!

In other news, I now know way too much about Hans Christian Andersen's life (or, what some psychiatrist who couldn't be bothered to learn Danish in spite of his wish to know everything about Andersen made up about his life. Speculation is the best kind of research, it seems) and way too little about his work. But I might be able to find some more info tomorrow morning, which means I can start my plan and hopefully the essay tomorrow afternoon. Sigh. I wish I was organised. Or not doing an MA.

Procrastinators Anonymous

Hello, my name is Merel and I am a Procrastinator.
I got a heap of books out of the library today that I know I will never be able to read, and as most of them are biographies of Andersen rather than critical texts about his work, they are not much use anyways. I have four days to write my 2500-3000 word essay for Myth and Folktale, and after last week's class, which was taken by the course convener, showed me how little we've learnt this term in Myth and Folktale, I feel less than confident. I mean, I know I can write an essay in four days and the essay might even be reasonably good (after all, this is quite a normal amount of time for me to do an essay in), but really, we've learnt next to nothing. Whereas the other module tutors have forced us to think about the texts we've read, have given us good guidance in our thinking and actually taught (I know, revolutionary, isn't it?), our Myth and Folktale tutor, who set up this MA and used to be convener, has not. We've had presentations by students and very little discussion was ever done, and I feel quite pissed because I was looking forward to this module most of all. Especially as none of the other extra modules are actually ones I opted to do.
So not only do I wish that I had picked up some of these books about four weeks ago, something I wish every time I start an essay, I also wish I would have had a good tutor for this course so I knew what to actually write about. I mean, I know I am writing about The Little Mermaid and the idea that fairy tales make the complexities of life simpler and more reassuring (hah. I do NOT agree with that), but I have no idea how it will all work out.
Ah well, I will just start writing sometime in the next few days and see what happens. (Or, in reality, I will be reading criticism all day today and tomorrow, then making an essay plan tomorrow night and writing my essay Monday and Tuesday, with a small break on Monday for a hairdresser's appointment and lunch with a friend.)
Now that you have read this post, which took me about 15 minutes to write, can you see how good I am at this procrastinating lark? Mwuhahahahaaa.

Disgusted

I just read one of my own comments on a post from March, and would like to state for the record that Commander Riker is in no way attractive. Ew. I used to be very silly.

A Life In The Day

When the old man woke up he knew it was going to happen today. He had prepared for this, but found that when it came to the reality of it, it was surprisingly easy to accept. He got up. It was 5 o'clock in the morning, but he wanted to make the most of this particular day. He showered, got dressed and went out.
He walked through the dark city until he reached the park, where he sat down on a bench just as the sun started to come up over the lake. He stayed there, watching the sunrise, taking in every colour, scent and sound. When he felt the sun warming his face, he decided it was time to get up and get some breakfast. He lingered a few more moments, enjoying the warmth of the sun, got up and walked out of the park, into the barely wakened city.
The old man walked into a cafe and ordered his breakfast. He sat down next to the window and looked at the city he had in which he had spent so many wonderful days, and thought back to all the different places he had lived in during his life. When the waiter brought him his coffee and scrambled eggs on toast, the old man woke up from his reminiscence and concentrated on his first meal of the day. He could remember his mother now, so clearly, yet so long ago, telling him that breakfast was the most important meal of the day, food for the brain, my pet.
The old man spent the rest of the morning wandering around the city. He looked at his favourite buildings, visited his best-loved landmarks, and petted every dog he met on the way.
Around lunchtime the old man walked past a school where a group of children were playing football. The ball, kicked by a professional footballer disguised for the day as a 10-year-old boy, flew over the fence and landed in front of the old man's feet. Unable to resist, the old man joined the boys in their game. After making sure his side won the game, the old man went on his way, memories walking through his mind and greeting him like long-lost and much-loved friends.
All of a sudden, the familiar jingle of an ice-cream van woke the old man and he decided to have a large cone with all the toppings for his lunch.
After he had finished his lunch sitting on a bench next to the canal, the old man decided he was tired of walking. He got into a tram and spent a few hours happily going round the city, choosing to get out when he noticed a cinema that played the film he saw with his wife on their first date. The film brought up wonderful memories of the fifty-two years he had been married to her, and brought tears to his eyes when he thought of how much he had missed his wife in the last ten years. He had enjoyed every day with her, and although he still enjoyed life after she was gone, he had always felt her absence.
After the film, the old man felt tired. He had had a very good day, but now he was hungry and tired. He took the tram to his favourite restaurant, and chose the dishes he knew he loved. There were many dishes, and the old man had only a few bites from each plate, but enjoyed each bite thoroughly.
After dinner, happy and satisfied, the old man slowly walked home, and reached his front door as it started to rain. He looked up and a drop of rain hit him right on the tip of his nose. He smiled and took of his jacket, and, after a small pause, his shoes and socks. He rolled up his trouser legs and walked into the street. Then, as the rain poured down on his body, the old man slowly started dancing. He danced faster and faster until he fell down. As he was sat in the middle of a big puddle, the old man laughed until his stomach hurt. Then he stood up and walked into his house.
Alone in the house, he had a shower and put on his most comfortable pyjamas. He brushed his teeth, got into bed and looked at the picture of his wife that stood on the nightstand. The old man took it up, kissed the glass and put the picture on the pillow next to his. When he felt himself falling asleep, the old man thought over what had been the last day of his life. And as he closed his eyes for the final time, the old man smiled, thinking of what a good life it had been.

I Do Not Know What To Wear

I spent about half an hour shaving my legs this morning because I am in a skirt-wearing mood, only to find that the skirt I want to wear is now definitely too big. I know that's supposed to be good news (and yay! for me losing weight), but I don't have anything else to wear now! I will have to wear trousers, and then what was the point of shaving? Sigh, it's hard being a woman.

BUPA's Sinterklaas Present To Me

They don't know it yet, but the lovely people at BUPA International have given me an awesome Sinterklaas present: my new glasses!
I was told by the optician I would hardly notice a difference, but she lied. Apparently, the astigmatism (which is a different thing from stigmata, children) in my right eye (I always thought it was in my left, you learn something new every day!) changed by 30 degrees, so whereas my left eye doesn't notice anything odd about the new glasses, my right eye is highly confused. So not only does everything look much sharper than it used to, my right eye is also hurting a little bit. And so is my head. But I got a pretty new case for my new glasses, so I have no complaints. Sinterklaas has been good to me this year!

Happy Birthday Eve, Sinterklaas!

This is a fake (or 'helper') Sinterklaas but the best picture I could find within my time restraints, so HAPPY SINTERKLAAS everyone! I don't have anything to unwrap, no poems to read, no suprises to be frustrated by.... But my mum did send me some candy and a new book, so I won't complain (too much).

My Room Is Done

Here's the pictures of my room the way it finally ended up after all the changes instigated by the damp. I really like it this way, actually, and it's nice to have a bookcase!

I also had a good bitch about my stoner housemate when I went to Asda with my nice housemate, so I feel much better than I did this afternoon when she (the stoner) told me off for putting something in the recycling bin that wasn't supposed to be in it before she even bothered to ask if it was me who put it in there (it wasn't).

Almost.....

Tomorrow is Sinterklaas (all: yay!!!!) and today I got a parcel from my mother with pepernoten, chocolate cigarettes, chocolate coins, and two chocolate letters (although the biggest one is for Mr. G.). The parcel actually arrived while I was in Southampton, but the postman was obviously stupid and instead of leaving it with someone in my house, he left the parcel with my neighbour two doors down, and left a completely stupid note without a name on it at my house.
I was going to go and find out about the note this afternoon, but then while I was chatting to one of the girls from my course who I have lunch with on Mondays, my neighbour rang the doorbell and asked whether I was at home. He was a strange mix of helpfulness and grumpiness, but hey, I've got my parcel! And some of my books were in the parcel, so all is good.

Em, Free Dvds, James Bond, The Sea, And The House Of Eliott

Any weekend that includes the above must be a good weekend, right? Right indeed. I had a great weekend seeing Em and experiencing the delights of Southampton.
On Saturday we went shopping, and due to the cashier at Woolworth's being silly and me not paying attention, I got 'Sense and Sensibility' and 'Dirty Dancing' for free!! And I finally got a handheld blender (which was scanned and thus payed for), so I will be making Jerusalem Artichoke (which are neither from Jerusalem or actually artichokes) soup tonight... Let's hope it doesn't suck!
We then went out for dinner (cute (if not slightly scary) waiter, and the food was okay!) and to the new James Bond film, which was actually very good! I have been so disappointed in the last few James bond films, but this one restored my faith, and Daniel Craig is actually a really believable Bond! I know this sounds lame, but I thought the beginning and the title sequence were the best bits of the film, although the rest was really good, too.
The best thing about the weekend was the trip to the docks on Sunday. It was great, very cold and windy, and for some reason there was an ice cream van, so we had to have some ice cream! I felt so much better (not that I was feeling bad) after we'd had a good look at the docks, the water, the waves and the ships, and had the wind blow all the warmth out of me. Nice.
Then we went home and watched the first three episodes of 'House of Eliott'.
Perfect weekend, I say.

Oh, and this one's just for you, mama:

Mijn zuster en vriendinnen

kennen de schoonheid niet

ze fluiten naar de mannen

en niemand, niemand ziet

de BAAI, oh de BAAI,

fraaigelegen aan de kaai,

zet mijn hart in lichterlaai

aan de BAAI, oh de BAAI,

vond ik eindelijk mijn draai

maar je oogst slechts wat je zaait,

een pirate zegt bye, bye,

aan de BAAI.

Some More Ahoy!

I am up at silly time for a Saturday because I am going to see Em, one of my Warwick friends. I haven't seen her since graduation, and I'm really looking forward to it!! She's in Southampton, which, I believe, means I will see the sea!!! Wooohooo!! I've been told the beach isn't that nice, but sea is sea and has psychological benefits, so I am happy!! In celebration of Em and the sea, here's a picture:

New Glasses, Ahoy!!

Today I went into town for some shopping. I bought some Christmas presents and have almost decided on Mr G's present. (Damn him for having a birthday so close to Christmas, too much thinking in one month!) The two most exciting things about today happened in Waterstones and Specsavers respectively:
In Waterstones, where I looked for a present for Mr. G. and saw several things I wanted myself but did not buy, I met a guy who... wait for it... is also a Johnny Cash fan!!!! Woot!! First person ever!!! We discussed the new Cash CD which we both love, and then I had to go for my eyetest, which was quite upsetting cos I've never talked to another Cash-enthousiast before!
In Specsavers, apart from the guy who took my preliminary eye test who was slimey, everything went very well. My eyesight has only gone ever so slightly worse, and the guy who helped me choose my glasses was really cool! The best thing, however, was the 30% discount Specsavers does for students, wahey! This meant I could afford the lenses that are .6 mm thinner than the cheapest, and .5 mm thicker than the most expensive ones. And I am picking them up on Tuesday, which makes them a nice Sinterklaas present!

The Voices In My Head

Voice 1: I have to go to sleep, tomorrow is my one day of classes and I still need to finish one book and read an article for Theory. And we have that extra seminar, so sleep sleep sleep sleep sleep.
Voice 2: Yeah yeah, but what about the damp in my room? And where will I move what piece of furniture to and what if the damp never goes away and what if they won't give me a de-humidifier and what if I die of damp and what if I will never be able to sleep ever again because of my worrying, and also, I am pretty sure my period is starting so I will feel crappy anyways tomorrow so is it really worth sleeping at all?
Voice 1: Yes. Yes it is. Go to sleep. Get some rest. All will be okay, and if not, I can worry about it Thursday, when I actually have time to worry. Calm down and go to sleep.
Voice 3: Yeah, and get off the computer, idiot!!! That's not going to help the whole getting to sleep thing!
Voice 2: But... the worrying won't stop! It is never going to stop ever again, and I can't think of any nice stories to distract myself.
Voice 1: I worry too much.
Voice 2: I know, but I can't stop!
Voice 3: I could be practical about it and STOP WRITING THIS DAMN POST AND GO BACK TO BED!
Voice 2: What's the fun in that? Anyways, I would just worry some more.
Voice 1: Go. To. Sleep.
Voice 2: I. Can't. Stop. Worrying.
Voice 3: Get. Off. The. Damn. Computer.
Voice 4: Can everyone just SHUT UP so I can go to sleep???????!!!!!!!

More Blegh

Today I slept in until 10 because I was still very tired when the alarm clock went at half past 7. I now realise I have a cold, yay. Stupid having the heaters on! The wall under my window is not dripping wet though, so I guess it is helping. My stepmother said you can refuse to pay the rent with problems like this, but my housemate, who is experienced in making the University do things, says to demand they pay for a dehumidifier. Awesome, I might just do that!
Now I will go an have orange juice (and scrambled eggs, but I doubt they help with a cold).

I Feel Deflated

In the name of extreme helpfulness, two men just came to my room with a huge dismantled bookcase. Never mind that I was assured they would come towards the end of the week, giving me time to actually change around my room completely while still being able to do my work for Wednesday. I know it is all meant well and I do appreciate it, but still, I feel like crying.
I might just eat that chocolate Mr. G. left behind...
(The men, by the way, have left the bits of wardrobe behind and are coming back Thursday to put it together for me)

Update On The Damp

As I came back from my trip to the post office, the woman in charge of off-site housing and some man in an official-looking fleece were standing in front of my house looking lost. As I walked past because they didn't react to my surprised greeting (I had said in my email I would be in from 3pm onwards), the woman woke up and asked if they could come in with me. They had been in my room already and turned on the heating full blast (it is now on a medium setting), and wiped all the gunk off my walls.
I talked to them for a while and the outcome of our conversation was the following:
- I need to keep my heating on to keep air circulation going
- I need to change my furniture around so there's nothing up against outside walls
- I am getting a bookcase (this was the most exciting bit of the talk for me)
And I found out the following:
- The fleece man has more sense than the woman in charge of my house, as she wanted me to move almost everything in my room, whereas he suggested I swap my chest of drawers and bed and be done with it.
- The woman in charge of my house is not evil.
- Fleece man is nice and will deliver my bookcase at the end of the week.
So let's hope that
1) I will still be able to move around my room with my bed sticking out from the wall.
2) I won't fall out of my bed while sleeping.
3) The damp will go away.
4) The fleece man is as nice as he seems and brings me my (ugly-sounding but I don't care) bookcase soon!!

Oh, and the woman in the post office is still crazy. I think she deserves a post of her own some time soon.

Happy VS Unhappy

Things I am happy about:
- I had a lovely weekend with Mr. G.
- My new rose is doing extremely well (the old one died from too much water).
- I am seeing a friend I haven't seen in a while this weekend.
- The book I am reading for my course is actually entertaining.
- I have speakers for my laptop.
- My new Johnny Cash CDs are really good.

Things I am unhappy about:
- Three more weeks until I see Mr. G. again.
- I haven't been able to find a nice pair of glasses I can afford.
- Live Messenger is not working. Again.
- My room is incredibly humid, which not only means the two outside walls are actually wet and dripping and, in the case of the wall my bed is along, covered in wet dust and ick, but also that my windows are dripping onto the window sill. My books are kept in piles under the window sills, so not only do they get wet from the wall, but they also get dripped on. Yay! I have moved everything and written and angry email, but I doubt there is anything they can (or will be willing to) do.

Update On My Clever Little Brother

His Cambridge interview is on the 11th of December, and he's also going to visit Imperial College around that time because they gave him an offer!! You can guess how proud I am feeling, but you won't come very close!! Hope you will all send him some good thoughts, he deserves the best, my little brother does!

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

My msn wasn't working so I thought I'd be clever and install Live Messenger instead. That now isn't working either. And neither is something that my computer needs to show me the full joy of gmail. It has something to do with my firewall (or something. I dunno, security) but as I haven't changed anything, I am confused. And it doesn't help that I know nothing about computers. Grrrrrrrr.

My Weekend

On Friday I went to visit the Lovely Leni in Derby. It was great to see her again, and to finally see her new (well, new to me) house. We did all the good things; we went to an Ember Inn and had Chicken and Bacon Club Sandwiches, we spent about 3.5 hours in Primark (I only spent £15 and most of that on pyjamas), and we had some awesome Italian food. Then we had some more Chicken and Bacon Club Sandwiches, and then I had to go home...
My train back to Reading came through Coventry, so I decided to give Mr. G. a call to see if he was busy and he was, but I went to see him anyways. We had a really good time but I was feeling guilty about my course work so I went back home Monday evening. I also had lunch with the Wench on Monday while Mr. G. was at Uni, and it was good to see her again. All in all, I had a friends-filled weekend, but the best thing was this:


Back to work now! Have a nice week, all of youse.

What The Hell Is Going On?

I am up. It is almost 1 am and I am sat at my computer writing this post. For the last week, I have not been able to fall asleep and it's pissing me off. I actually have to get up on time tomorrow morning (which is technically today and in 7 hours) and I need to sleep!!! There's no traffic to keep me awake, no neighbours partying and I am not ill. I am actually very tired (this has been going on since Monday) and I WANT TO SLEEP!!!
RAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGH!!!!! And I don't even have Mr. G. to talk to because he needs to get up in 4 hours to catch a plane, so he's, guess what, asleep!!! Oh no, he's just signed in on msn, turns out neither of us can sleep!!
The world sucks, but at least someone shares my pain... heh.

All Hail The Cambridge Interviewee

No, not me. My little brother!! Let's all send him good thoughts! He hasn't told me when the interview is, but hey, a bit of good-thought-sending never goes amiss!!

My Ideal Man

Some of you might not know him, but Lucky Luke, the cowboy who can shoot faster than his shadow, has been my ideal man for a long time. He's brave, cute, well-dressed and has a trusty steed. What else does a girl need?
I do think his horse, Jolly Jumper, would be jealous of all the attention Lucky Luke would be giving me, and the Dalton brothers might kidnap me every once in a while, but every relationship has its problems...
And of course I would have to make him stop smoking, but other than that, Lucky Luke was, is, and always will be, the perfect man. If only he wasn't a cartoon... Mr. G. would be out of the picture in no time!!

***UPDATE***
My mother has informed me that Lucky Luke has, in fact, already stopped smoking and now sports a bit of straw instead of a cigarette. I guess I should thank whichever EU official came up with that!

So There

To Be Continued...

Of course, Bernard had never meant to become Rubbish Man and doom his relationship with Claire forever. He loved her very much, but after four years of coming second, or even lower down, on the list of priorities in Awesome Lady's busy life, he had had enough. He left her. Or rather, he tried to leave her. But in spite of all his hatred of what she had become, he still loved the tiny part of Awesome Lady that remained hidden to most people.
In order to survive as a superhero, Awesome Lady had all but erased the young woman she used to be. Claire, if ever thought of, was considered by Awesome Lady as a distant memory, nothing important, and definitely an unnecessary part of her personality. To Bernard, however, it had become the only thing in his life worth living for. He didn't like his job (he never managed to finish his chemistry degree) and hated having to appear at public events with Awesome Lady, where everyone ignored him because he was so plain-looking. If people did talk to him it was usually to order drinks, and Bernard had long given up trying to explain he was not a waiter, and usually spent all evening walking to and fro with drinks.
And then there was Brock Supernova. He was the young god of superheroes, and young girls everywhere fell asleep every night thinking of him. Every month another article about the suspected relationship between Awesome Lady and Supernova was published, and every month Bernard grew more and more jealous of the two. He knew Awesome Lady and Brock Supernova were not in love (Brock had a lovely boyfriend who was just as invisible as Bernard, but thankful for it), but the fact that Supernova got to spend more time than Bernard with the woman he loved angered him beyond reason.
So, regardless of the dangers he would be putting Claire and Awesome Lady in, Bernard started to experiment. He still had his textbooks and some good friends left from his time at University, and he set up a laboratory in the shed.

HELP!!

I want to make my blog look nicer. I like this template best for how everything fits on the page, but I am not too sure about the colours.... Sigh.
What's the good of having a designer boyfriend when he's not around to help you make your blog look nicer?

Procrastination Is The New Black

Things I have to do today:

• finish the chapter on Snow White in my Fairy Tale book
• reread three theory articles
• prepare my presentation for next week so I can discuss it with my partner in crime

Things I have done today so far:

• chatted to Mr. G. and The Lovely Leni on msn for about an hour after getting up
• showered, washed my hair and got dressed
• had some really nice breakfast (first, some left over tortelini, then, toast with tomato and goat's cheese)
• walked to campus to return some library books
• bought a cup of tea and a brownie from my favourite cafe on campus
• walked home, had aforementioned tea and brownie. Both were very satisfactory
• listened to some woman on the radio claiming that the world is ruled by women and we should be nice to men. Pah.
• tidied my room a bit
• started this post

I like how the second list is much longer, yet I haven't really done anything all day!

So Far, All Is Good...

Today I read Peter Pan, which is so dull I feel betrayed by everyone who has made me think it is awesome, including (and I know this must be a shock for you) Johnny Depp. There, I said it. Seriously, why is there such a to do about the thing? Maybe the play is good (I will test this as I have the play because I thought we were reading that rather than the book), but the book is dull dull dull. J. M. Barrie, I am sorry to say, was not a good writer.
Once I'd finished that (and had dinner) I was bored. So I thought I'd switch over to Beta Blogger, and change my template! What do you guys think? I really like it, I was getting a bit sick of the dullness (guess what the theme for today is?) and seriousness of the old template. I actually think this template and its colourfulness suits me more, or at least I hope it does. I've been feeling a bit lonely and weird lately, so choosing a more colourful template for my blog is just part of me making myself realising that actually, I am quite a fun person! Hah.
On the schedule for tomorrow is Black Beauty, so I am preparing for another day of dull. I will also have a walk along the lake to make sure I get some fresh air, and dinner will be improvised lasagna as I have no lasagna sheets in spite of going to the shop for them today, and no stuff to make white sauce as my milk went bad and I forgot to buy some more while in aforementioned shop. Fun fun fun!!!
I am getting better at actually cooking meals now, thanks to Mr. G. He is a really good cook and wants me to make nice food for myself, so I am trying... Having an organic veggie and fruit box delivered is also helping, as I have to eat the vegetables or feel really bad about myself. And they put random things in that I would never buy myself, so I need to think about my food more. Although this week they gave me a load of onions, which means I have to 1) use those in my food, something I don't usually do, and 2) deal with the fact that it means less 'real' vegetables this week.
And I've finally found a cheddar I really like, thanks to me having a sandwich at a friend's house on Thursday evening.
That's it for the update of the weekend.

Home Alone

This weekend, for the first time in a long time, I will be all alone, to do as I please. The thing is, I have no idea what to do. I think mainly I will be doing course work, but other than that, I have, literally, no idea. I don't like being alone, which I am sure comes from a long period of not liking myself, and I just don't know what to do.
Tomorrow I am going into town to book an eye test (getting new glasses soon, yay!), and then to asda for food. I tidied and cleaned my room today, as I do every Thursday. That leaves Saturday and Sunday, and then Monday and Tuesday. Except for lunch on Monday, I will be all alone. There will be people around, sure, but no friends or anything. I am scared. What does one do on their own?
Let's just hope the amounts of work I have will keep me busy all weekend.

Insanely Happy Or Just Insane?

Last weekend Mr. G. gave me his old phone. It's not a battered old thing, but a fairly new looking and sooooo pretty (pause to wipe drool off face) Motorola Razr... And he's given me a SIM card with it that will give me free texts and thus save money. I'll let y'all know my new number when my old credit has gone. I would just like to state, once again, that I have the best boyfriend ever... Happy happy happy!!
Today I was phoned for the first time, by Waterstones to say a book I ordered was in. It took me a while, in the strange state between sleep and non-sleep, to understand that it was my phone and not just some random sound. I picked the ringtone myself, but I obviously am not popular enough to have gotten used to it...
Then, later in the day, as I was walking on campus, my insurance man phoned me. I was thinking of fairy tales (as I have been for the last two days), so when I heard the sound of my phone (the ringtone is called 'ambient mood') I actually thought I was being transported into a fairy tale. Seriously, I am not joking, for a few seconds, I actually thought some awesome magical power was summoning me to another realm...

It's up to you guys to decide, but I am beginning to think I am actually going insane.

A Fairy Tale Of Sorts

The prince had travelled for a very long time. He was tired from walking for over a year without company. His horse had been stolen many months ago while he was asleep in a forest, and with the horse he had also lost his change of clothing, most of his food and money, and the greater part of his cheerful disposition. To be quite honest, the prince was now, so near to his goal, more a grumpy, dirty and unshaven man than the handsome, cheerful and clean prince he used to be. He had endured many hardships on his journey and every single wrong turn and night's sleep on the bare soil without dinner had taken something out of him.
His tired eyes looked up at the turret of the castle which he could just about make out through the vast rose bushes covering the palace. He sighed a big sigh, pulled up his trousers (he had long ago sold his belt for food and with all the weight he'd lost the trousers barely fit) and took his dagger out of his right boot. Realising he couldn't hold up his trousers and cut at the rose bushes at the same time, he knotted his trousers as tightly around his waist as he could and walked around the rose bushes, trying to find the part of the wall of roses that was closest to where he guessed the gates of the palace were.
As he started cutting the rose bushes, an old woman walked up, sat down on the ground and started humming. After a few minutes, in which the prince had cut halfway through a branch and had managed to get his arms covered in cuts and blood, the old woman spoke to him. 'Young man,' she said, 'what do you think you are doing?'
The prince, glad to have an excuse to stop torturing himself for the sake of a woman he had never seen, sat down next to the old lady and told her all about the prophecy at his birth and how he had set out on his twenty-first birthday to find the woman he was destined to marry. He told her about the way the rosebushes were supposed to magically open for him to form a path to his beloved, how the castle's inhabitants would be frozen into whatever they were doing when time froze, and how his beloved, having been asleep for a hundred years, would be awakened by the kiss of her true love. He also told her about his journey, and as he had had no one to talk to for a long time and was feeling quite sorry for himself, when he was done talking, he burst out crying.
The old woman said nothing, but embraced the young prince and let him cry until he felt a bit more like himself again. He apologised to the lady and was about to start cutting again, when the old lady stopped him and asked: 'Why don't you come to my house and have a bath and some food before you wake up the princess?' The prince, who was really very tired and hungry, didn't need much convincing and he went with the old lady to her house, which was on the other side of the castle, just outside the rose wall.
The old lady drew the prince a bath and gave him some new, clean clothes. As he was bathing she prepared him a nice dinner, and the prince accidentally cut himself shaving when he smelled the exquisite aromas. When the prince came into the kitchen after his bath and shave, he was almost unrecognisable. After he had his dinner and had sat by the fire for a little while, the prince started to feel like he was his old self again. With his clean clothes, full stomach and content smile he looked and felt much more like a prince than he had when he had first gotten to the palace.
After he'd had a short nap in the easy chair in front of the fire, he told the old woman he was going back to the rose bush. The old woman wished him good luck, but asked; 'could you please do me one favour before you go? I need some more fire wood, but I am too weak to lift the axe.' The prince, who was raised to be kind to older people and pay back kindness, but was also just a nice guy, had no problems doing this for the old woman and he went into her back garden.
As he was chopping the wood for the old woman, he looked up mid-chop and saw the most beautiful woman walking towards him. She came from the forest behind the castle and was carrying a basket filled with food. The woman smiled at the prince and as she came closer, he saw she was the same age as he was, and also that she was obviously related to the old lady. When she was right in front of him she greeted him and asked: ' Where is my great-grandmother?' The prince, almost unable to talk, forgot all about his destiny and the princess sleeping in the turret, and walked into the house with her. All evening the old woman watched the young woman and the prince talking and falling more in love with each word they spoke and each look they exchanged.

On their wedding day, the old lady thought back to the day, long ago, when she had fled her father's palace to be with the man she loved. She smiled as she realised that the prince's destiny had finally been fulfilled.

I Survived The Weekend, Or; I Am Still Insanely Happy

This is the present I made for Mr. G. He loved it and said, and I quote: 'You rock!' His parents are very friendly and, together with his brothers, made me feel very welcome. I met some of the rest of his family too, who were very nice. Believe it or not but I didn't talk much this weekend, so maybe once his parents realise the full extent of my noise skills, they'll stop liking me!!!
Also, spending another weekend with Mr. G. has made me realise how happy he really makes me. We have a lot of similar ideas about what we want our lives to be like, even though we have very different tastes in music and the cats/dogs issue will probably never be resolved!
I don't want to analyse too much right now because I am tired and need to do a lot of work tomorrow, but I just wanted to let y'all know I am still happy and no longer afraid of in-laws!!
Three weeks until we see each other again, sigh...

I Worry Too Much

I am up, cleaned, dressed, brushed, and packed. To be completely honest, I need to put on some socks but my cold feet distract me from the nerves that are upsetting my stomach, and they also form a nice, ehm, I should know this shouldn't I? Simile? I dunno, outside manifestation of what I am feeling inside.
I am meeting Mr. G.'s parents today.
I know that sounds like way too early in the relationship, but it is Mr. G.'s birthday tomorrow, and I was going to go up anyways, so it seems silly not to go just because I'll have to meet his parents. They, apparently, are really looking forward to meeting me, but those of you who know about my past experience of 'parents-in-law' can probably understand my nerves.
And to make things even worse, I was so busy making Mr. G.'s present last night (I know! I will put a picture of it up after the weekend) that I forgot my apple pie that was in the oven. I took off most of the burnt bits and I am taking it anyways because the bottom part of the pie is still okay, but it doesn't feel the same. The strange thing is, having an apple pie with me when I meet new people always makes me feel slightly more confident, because before yesterday, I hadn't really ever messed up a pie.
Anyways, I just wanted to let you know I am extremely nervous... Please think nice thoughts around lunchtime, which is when my train will come in. Hopefully I will also have managed to eat something by then (what doesn't go down, can't come up!!)

Dental Anxiety, Or, Sorry Mama!

Tomorrow morning I have an appointment with the dentist.
I haven't been to a dentist in over three years.
I am very scared of tomorrow morning's appointment.
Before you all start judging me, I would like to state the following, and that is that like any self-respecting 80s kid, I am blaming this gross neglect of dental happiness on my parents.
From when I had teeth until I moved to Germany about 5 years ago, I had the same dentist, Dr. Lie. Dr. Lie was awesome. His wife was his assistant, and they made a dynamite team. I was never afraid of going to the dentist, because I knew and trusted Dr. Lie with my teeth like I'd never trust anyone else with anything.
But then, when I was about 14 years old, I had to have braces. My orthodontist was a German lady and quite nice, but she had the biggest nostrils imaginable, which I was of course always staring into, while being fitted more instruments (and accesories) of torture. Her team was incredibly inept, which meant I sometimes ended up with bits of wire sticking into my cheeks and gums. In case you're wondering: it is not nice to have to ask your mum to use a nailclipper in your mouth because you have a wire sticking into your cheek (and I'm sure my mum wasn't too thrilled about it either). This started my fear of dentists in general, and German dentists in particular.
I moved to Germany, where I went to a dentist (my braces having been removed at this point in time), who started filing my front teeth to make them more symmetrical. I don't even have words for that kind of insanity.
I then had to have two of my wisdom teeth cut out because they were growing horizontally rather than vertically (Paul, if you are reading this, don't read the rest!!). I won't bore/gross you out with the details, but I did not like this experience. I could feel everything being cut and broken, and was actually crying throughout the entire procedure. I then got an infection, which was a nice addition to an already quite traumatic experience.
When all this was over and I moved to England, I somehow just never got around to going to the dentist... So I hope that tomorrow, I will be reasonably cavity-less and not too much yelled at by my new (and hopefully lovely) dentist.
(In case you were wondering: my parents are to blame because they, of course, picked Dr. Lie and the German evil dentists and thus scarred me for life.)

******UPDATE*****

I have 'excellent cleaning' and all my teeth are 'sound'. The receptionist is evil and I had to pay £42.50 to get the wire, which is glued behind my bottom front teeth, reglued to one of those teeth. Haha, I laugh in the face of people who say you should go to the dentist every 6 months. HAHA!! But I promise you I will not let the knowledge that I have excellent cleaning go to my head... too much.

Denial Is A River In Egypt

One morning, the Pretty Girl woke up feeling full of happiness and laughter. She jumped out of bed, put on her prettiest dress and nicest shoes, and decided to ignore the piles of work that made it hard for her to see the floor of her Dowdy Little Hut. The Pretty Girl opened the door of her Dowdy Little Hut and looked at the world outside. She saw a big green meadow filled with fragrant and colourful flowers, basking in the warmth of the sun. Among the flowers and grass rabbits and squirrels were hopping about, and the Pretty Girl could not contain herself. She jumped out of her Dowdy Little Hut, and found as soon as she left it, the Dowdy Little Hut disappeared. All she could see was the meadow, warm and sunny, all around her. She heard the faint noises of a magical tune seducing her unto dance and song, and she kicked of her shoes to follow it.
As the squirrels and rabbits played amongst the flowers, the Pretty Girl danced and sang through the meadow until all the sorrows of the Mundane World and the Dowdy Little Hut were distant memories, like the vague remembrance of something that has once happened to a best friend's aunt.

Word Of The Day

The word of the day today is:

wife-icidal

I read it in an article on fairy tales my tutor made me read, so it's a proper word!

The Brave Maiden And The Photocopier

Once upon a time not too long ago, in a place quite close by, a beautiful Brave Maiden went on a quest. She needed to pick up and photocopy an article for her Theory of Children's Literature class, so at nine o'clock in the morning, after a hearty breakfast, she set out on her journey. For a while everything was going very well and the Maiden was happy with her day. Then she got to the Kingdom of Literature and had to fight her way through thornbushes and brambles to get to the Fount of Knowledge. When she finally got there, she signed the sign-out paper and fought her way through the brambles once again to get to the Place of Duplication. When she got there, without proper knowledge of the proper procedure for approaching the Amazing Duplicator, she sought one of that gate keepers who was not very friendly to her and made her feel more lost than ever before.
But the Maiden did not despair or cry like other, less brave, maidens may have done; instead, she sought out a nicer-looking gate keeper. The Friendly Gate-Keeper looked at her, listened to her quest and said: 'Dear Brave Maiden, your quest will be difficult and perilous. Before you can go to the Amazing Duplicator, you will have to Pay Me to receive the Key of All Goodness. Once you have the Key of All Goodness, you must find the Door of All Goodness and open it with the Key, The door will then lead you to the Amazing Duplicator, but make sure you choose the right one because there are few Duplicators who will let you make double-sided Duplications. Choose well and you will be rewarded. Choose badly and you will be punished.' The Maiden paid the Friendly Gate-Keeper, received her key and went up the Mount of Knowledge, to find the Door of All Goodness. She gave him her Key, and he spoke: 'Brave Maiden, to achieve the goal of your quest you will have to go down the Mount of Knowledge, past the Friendly Gate-Keeper, and into the Area of Short-Lived Joy. When you get there, the Amazing Duplicator will help you.'
The Brave Maiden thanked the Door of All Goodness, but although she thought he had been helpful, he had not told her that the Amazing Duplicator and the Door of All Goodness were sworn enemies. So when the Brave Maiden came to the Amazing Duplicator, he rejected her fiercely: 'Go away you puny little girl!!! I will not obey that damn Door of All Rubbishness!!!' (The Amazing Duplicator, although good at Duplicating, wasn't very good at insults.)
The Brave Maiden almost thought her quest was thwarted by the Amazing Duplicator's unwillingness to help her, but then she remembered the Friendly Gate-Keeper. She went back to her friend and asked for help. The Friendly Gate-Keeper told her how to deal with the Amazing Duplicator and how he liked to be payed rather than form alliances with the Doors of Goodness. She then sounded her horn and in rode a Handsome Knight on his White Horse.
The Handsome Knight told the Maiden he could help her with the Amazing Duplicator because of his Magical Skills.
When they got to the Amazing Duplicator, the Brave Maiden inserted her coins into the slot and watched the Handsome Knight as he used his Magic to make the Duplicator do exactly what she wanted it to do. The Brave Maiden paid a lot of attention to the Handsome Knight's Magic. As the Handsome Knight rode away, the Brave Maiden realised he had not actually made the Duplicator do exactly what she wanted, so she imitated the Handsome Knight's Magic and found she could master the Amazing Duplicator quite well.
Of course, the Brave Maiden was punished for her smugness, when the Duplicator refused to Duplicate her last page. One of the Grumpy Gate-Keepers sounded her horn and out came the Old Wizard who made the Duplicator work again, although the Brave Maiden did have to Pay More Money to the Amazing Duplicator to get her last page.
After she had all her pages gathered together, the Brave Maiden brought back the original article to the Kingdom of Literature, in which she knew her way quite well now, and began her long journey home.

Dear Brave Maidens,
We can learn from this tale not to rely on Handsome Knights on White Horses. They may promise Beauty and Happiness, but do not be foiled by their charms! Be brave, observe the world around you and do not despair, and you will find happiness! Do not reject Handsome Knights altogether, but be careful not to become dependent on them.

I Am Insanely Happy

Early last week, I was walking around in Reading trying to find Baby Bio (I didn't find it and although I have it now I think my rose has sort of died), and I was feeling a bit strange. I'd been feeling a bit strange for a few days and all of a sudden it hit me: I was happy. Not that I have been miserable for the last 22 years, but last week I realised that for the first time in a long time, I was genuinely happy. Happy with myself, my life, my friends, and my relationship with my parents.
I was going to write something about it but didn't have a chance as I had classes and then went birthday shopping in Brum (not telling you how much I spent in Primark but it was a personal record) with Leni on Thursday, and then I spent the weekend in Cov. I stayed over at a friend's house for the weekend, but I also went and saw the Wench in her new (and lovely) room. The friend I stayed with is a guy I have known for little over two years. We used to work together on the Information Desk at the DIY store, and when he left for Hamburg last summer we stayed in contact through msn and became really good friends. This summer he came back to the UK and he's now in Cov doing the last year of his degree.
While we were talking on msn I slowly grew to fancy him, but I didn't think it was that serious because we only really became friends on msn, and I wasn't sure whether I was just feeling lonely or something else. When I saw him for a barbecue earlier this summer I realised he was the nice guy I thought he was from msn, but wasn't quite sure whether I really fancied him. So, on Thursday I was quite nervous to see what would happen, as I didn't want to mess up the awesome friendship we have.
A soon as I saw him on Thursday evening, however, I knew that all the feelings I had for him were real, and I sort of thought he felt the same about me, but I wasn't sure...
On Friday evening we went out (and on Saturday I realised why I do not drink alcohol, it gives me ridiculous stomach aches), and when we got home we started talking and, well, things happened (no, not like that, get your mind out of the gutter!! We just kissed!) and now Mr. G and I are happily coupled up. As the Wench can confirm, I have not been able to wipe the grin off my face all weekend, and I don't think it is going to leave for a while yet.

The Need For A Man: A Play In One Act

The time is half past 8 in the evening. In a reasonably small community kitchen of a university house stands a young woman with a frying pan in one hand, a partially eaten apple in the other. She puts the frying pan on the front left hob of the electric cooker (stage right), turns the hob to the highest setting and walks to the sink (stage left). She opens the cupboard above the sink and takes out a used, but nearly full, bottle of olive oil, opens it and pours some of the oil in the pan, after which she closes the bottle and puts it back in the cupboard. She takes a bite out of her apple and walks to the fridge (stage right, behind the cooker) out of which she takes something wrapped in aluminium foil. She unwraps the foil and puts a hamburger in the pan with oil, which has now heated up. Throughout all this the young woman keeps eating her apple, until it is finished. She throws away the foil and the apple core, and walks to the sink to wash her hands. She notices some crockery and cutlery that is standing next to the sink, checks that it is dry and proceeds to put the things in the cupboard above the sink, but leaves a yellow plate standing in the drying rack.
When she is done, the young woman takes the plate and puts it on the work surface (front of stage, so that when the young woman uses it she faces the audience). She takes out a cucumber and a sharp knife from the cupboard above the sink, cuts the cucumber in half on the plate, puts the rest back in the cupboard and peels and dices the cucumber halve. She realises something, walks to the electric cooker and turns over the hamburger. She returns to the work surface, then moves to the cupboard, takes out the rest of the cucumber and peels and dices it, until the entire cucumber is cut up on one half of her plate. She walks to the fridge and takes out two containers. She opens the plastic wrapping of one and takes out 5 cherry tomatoes on the vine. She washes them, cuts them into parts and places these on top of the cucumber. She then opens the other container and puts all the cold (but cooked) green beans in the container on the tomatoes and cucumber. She puts the empty green beans' container next to the sink, then puts the rest of the tomatoes, still in the container, back in the fridge. She takes out a small jar and puts it next to the plate. She remembers something, turns down the heat on the hamburger, then walks to the cupboard, takes out two slices of bread and puts them in the toaster (on top of the fridge).
She walks back to the work surface, picks up the jar and tries to open it. It will not open. She tries one more time, but the jar won't budge. She shrugs her shoulders, walks to the fridge and takes out a jar of mayonnaise, and takes the slices of bread, that are now done, from the toaster, then puts the bread on the plate and the jar of mayonnaise on the work surface. She walks to the cupboard and takes out a jar of mustard. She spreads mustard on one of the slices, then mayonnaise on the other. She puts back the mustard, then the mayonnaise, turns off the heat on the hamburger and puts it on one of the slices of bread. She then puts the other one on top of the hamburger, and walks off (stage right).
When the young woman comes back, she is carrying a paper towel and has a determined look on her face. She wraps the paper towel around the jar and tries to open it again. She fails. She tries again. The jar simply will not open. As she keeps on trying, removing the paper towel after three tries and trying a few more times with her bare hands, the young woman becomes more and more desperate. Slowly, tears begin to trickle down her face. She becomes more and more pathetic-looking, but is still determined to open the jar.
Finally, she realises she cannot open the jar and she breaks down. She throws the jar on the floor, where it breaks in a million dressing-covered pieces, and sinks down on the floor next to it. As she tries to scoop up the bits of glass in an effort to save her dressing, she realises what she is doing and breaks down in hysteric sobs. The young woman is now half sitting, half lying on the floor, crying and bleeding from the shards of glass stuck in her hands. Finally, she manages to sit up. She looks at her ruined jar of dressing and cries out (still sobbing, but trying to suppress it):

Where's my God-damn Prince Charming?

Lights fade until stage is completely black and silent.

[disclaimer: this is fiction, people! I am not having a crisis of any sort]

Very Important Post

Just so all of you know:


HAPPY BIRTHDAY LENI!!!!!


We'll have an awesome time tomorrow!

Today Is A Good Day

I got a haircut, and absolutely love my new hair!! When my hairdresser said 'fringe' i was quite worried, but it all looks fine and I'm really happy! Let's just hope I will not go so poor on the coming term that I canot keep up the appointments. I really hated my hair before I got this haircut, so I want to keep it up because I really like it now!
I went into town and the guy in the shop did something to my glasses which means they are now both clean and fit better. I do still need new glasses, but I guess I will have to make do with these for now... damn laptop. Although perhaps both the laptop repair and my glasses are covered by my differeing insurances, so let's hope for the best!
I also found this amazing Johnny Cash box set with lots of songs I don't have yet, and lots of pictures. It costs £50 so I haven't bought it, but just knowing it exists is nice... (and the guy in the shop was cute)
Also, I finally decided on a present for the Lovely Leni, I hope she'll like it!

Brick

Earlier this week, I went to see 'Brick'. This is the Film Theatre's description:

"True to its designation as Twin Peaks scripted by Raymond Chandler, Brick is and honest mystery, mounting a series of clues, twists and red herrings before hitting a mind-reeling climax. The characters are all from the ranks of an elaborate, school social scene. The excellent Joseph Gordon-Levitt as the high-school loner Brendon [sic], gets drawn into the disappearance and death of his ex-girlfriend. Certainly, this year's Donnie Darko. "

Here's my review:

Brick is a pretentious attempt at an original film, which fails miserably at trying to surprise or entertain. None of the characters, who are supposedly in school at least for part of the day, act or talk like high school pupils, and although Joseph Gordon-Levitt acts well, he seems more like a 45-year-old 'copper fallen from grace' than a confused and hurt high school kid. There are some good jokes about the fact that these people are supposed to be kids, but that's all there is to make the film more interesting. Or, no, sorry, I lie: there was a really muscly guy and J G-L does scruffy well. Nonetheless, I couldn't stop from letting my mind wander during the film, and this is where it wandered: 'If this Brendan guy turns out to be an undercover cop this would be like a really long, boring episode of 21 Jump Street'

So I guess it really depends on who you believe - Ken Branagh's crew or me. Mind you, I haven't seen Donnie Darko, so maybe we are saying the same thing...

All Praise The Geeks

Why, I hear you ask?
Because they fixed my laptop! And the only thing I had to give them in return was a shitload of money!
I am sorting out Skype as well so I can receive and make phone calls to normal phones, but it is taking some time for my credit card payments to get through, I don't know why. I am trusting the geeks and trying not to be worried.

Who Am I?

I simply had to steal this from the Wench:

Whooooo are you.. ooh ooh ooh ooh
Stolen from Livejournal:

1. YOUR SPY NAME (middle name and current street name):
Rosanna Redlands (personally, I think this is an awesome name, maybe I can change mine...)

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME (grandfather/mother on your dad's side and your favourite candy):
I guess that would be... Cato Werther. I'd be mostly in artsy underground films.

3. YOUR RAP NAME (first initial of first name and first three or four letters of your last name):
M to da M I E

4. YOUR GAMER TAG (favourite colour and favourite animal):
Blue Tiger

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name, and city you were born in):
Rosanna Amsterdam, Rosie to mates.

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME (first three letters of your last name, last three letters of mother's maiden name, first three letters of your pet's name):
Miesenbop (I think I would be an evil character)

7. JEDI NAME (middle name spelled backwards, your mom's maiden name spelled backwards):
annasor nessinueht (call me crazy, but I think that kinda works...)

8. PORN STAR NAME (first pet's name, the street you grew up on):
Goliath Mondriaan (I have to say, Wench, I think I beat you... but I did turn into a guy while doing it)

9. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The", your favourite colour and the automobile your dad drives):
The Blue Nothing (I'm a very existential superhero)

10. YOUR ACTION HERO NAME (first name of the main character in the last film you watched, last food you ate):
Brendan Banana (I don't even know what to say to this. Brilliant)

My Laptop Is In The Hospital...

Friday night my computer stopped working. It is with a man right now who will hopefully fix it, but it does mean I won't be online so much. I also have to read all of 'Emile' before Wednesday afternoon, so there will be much less posting I am afraid.
Please all pray for my beautiful laptop.... (and my wallet, it's a good thing I didnt buy an mp3 player because this is going to cost me A LOT of money...)

What Does A Rose Eat?

I bought a Pot Rose today at ASDA's while I was there trying to find the Bramley apples for the pie thats in the oven right now. These are the instructions:

(Pot Rose) I am easy to care for.
Give me a cool, bright room away from direct sunlight.
Keep compost moist at all times
and feed every two weeks.

Apart from the difficulty of finding a bright room away from direct sunlight, there's one big problem in these instructions: what does a pot rose eat? I mean, seriously, because it already says I have to keep the compost moist, so what does it eat apart from water? HELP!!!
Easy to care for, my ass.

A Day Of Disappointments?

Today I decided to go to campus early to catch the quiet end of Fresher's Fair. Well, that did happen, but in a different way than I thought it would. There were about 4 stalls, and only one of them was about volunteering (the whole reason I went - it's not like I want to socialise or anything!). So I talked to the people at the stall, signed up for a mailing list and, with a pitying look on my face, made one round through the marquee and then left for the library.
In the library I managed to get my username and password, but was utterly confused by the printer system, which just seems way too complicated and unefficient to me. Then I signed up for a training session on Monday, and left again, feeling slightly more confused about the whole thing than I had felt before I entered the library.
I decided not to go to the Student Union's welcome, but to do my German aptitude test instead. I have taken the test home with me because I cannot hand in my application form until someone from my department has signed it even though I am doing the German course as a non-credit course, meaning it isn't part of my degree. But I have an MA meeting tomorrow morning at 10 so I will get it signed then and hope I get a place...
I walked home through the rain to find my room had... changed... There was a parcel on my chair, that had been moved to the far side of my room. I got really freaked out (because I know I locked my door before I went out) and knocked on my housemate's (the nice one) door, but she hadn't been in my room. She did tell me that the uni sometimes just goes into your room to sort out things, tho, and lo and behold, when I got to my room and looked more closely there was a new lock on my window! Still don't like the idea, though. It kinda makes me not feel very at home...
Then someone knocked on my door and it was the lady in charge of my house telling me off about last night. I should have only phoned security (which I know already because security told me) and not also the fire brigade. She then told me I could take away the net curtain if I didn't like it, and then left me to feel... well, sullied and unusual!
I opened the first envelope which I thought was my NUS card, but it turned out to be the 'poster' of a Johnny Cash/Elvis Presley concert I had bought online. Severe disappointment, as I was expecting a full-size poster and not an A4 print-out. I should get a refund for it, but still.. I'd rather have the poster.
Then I proceeded to open the Amazon parcel which I was sure would cheer me up as I'd ordered some Johnny Depp films Wednesday (although I ordered them from Play.com, which explains the confusion I felt when I saw it). Instead, when I opened it, I was disappointed again. It was a Johnny film, yes, but the wrong one!!! I was getting very tired and irate at this point, when I looked at the receipt to check how I'd ever made this mistake, I found the sweetest note from the Wench!!!
Thank you for making a day of small disappointments into a day in which I got a thoughtful present from a good friend!!!

I Like Firemen

In a nice example of fact is stranger than fiction, our fire alarm went off last night. Now, in order for most of you to understand this, I will have to give you some background information, so here goes.
It al started on Wednesday... I experienced one of the most horrible Fire Safety Trainings I have ever experienced. You might think I haven't had that many, but at work we used to have them, and fire drills, quite often, and they were nothing like what I had to sit through on Wednesday. Everyone living in Halls or University Accommodation has to attend a Fire Safety talk this week, which I think is a really good precaution of the University. I, of course, was expecting a dull hour of University security people talking at us and showing us some lame-ass video. I was right about the video: there was a very obviously fake 'real-life' story thing made by the drama society, which was good at explaining what to do in case of a fire (and what not to do), but had immensely crap special effects. At one bit a girl catches on fire in the video, but it was so obviously fake most of the people in the room snickered. Not at the fact she was catching fire, mind, but at the 'CGI'.
When the video was over a Fireman stepped up and this is where the real fun started. He talked about how all students are stupid and all fires are caused by our carelessness, and NEVER by accident, there's ALWAYS some f*cking stupid student behind it!!! And then he said he was appalled by how every time they showed the video people would laugh at the bit where the girl burns, because if we'd seen what he'd seen we wouldn't think it funny. Out came the story about the Indian lady with the cheap sari that caught fire, and then, to top up the immense fun we were having, he showed us pictures. Yes, pictures of burnt people. Burnt because they were drunk and stupid or stoned and stupid.
All in all, I was holding back my tears at the end of it. I realise the need for fire safety and I can understand students can be more stupid than others, but this was just too much. I was really angry with that fireman, but my housemate (I'll get back to her in a minute) thought it was a hilarious meeting.
In any case, as I was cooking last night before going to Pirates of the Caribbean 2, with the fire door closed and the back door open to let out the cooking fumes, the fire alarm went off. I didn't think there was a real fire, but I turned of the hobs just in case, walked outside and called 999 as the man had told us to. I told them I didn't think there was a real fire but they sent a team anyways. After about 5 minutes of the alarm going off, the one housemate that was at home came out and said I should phone security as well, which I did. I found out that my housemate, obviously ignoring everything they had told us on Wednesday, had propped open the fire door with the bin and opened and the back door (which I had closed). So I closed them again and waited outside. When everyone arrived I felt very silly but also upset (because the fireman on Wednesday had said my Uni is close to not getting any fire brigade coverage because of the many hoax calls), but the firemen and the security men told me I had done the right thing and not to worry. They told off my housemate for not waiting outside, but she seemed to think the whole thing was a joke anyway, so I've decided to rely on myself rather than her in the case of an actual emergency.
We didn't find out why the alarm had gone off, but I have two possible theories:
1) because I had left the back door open, the steam from my cooking went through the back door, into the garden, and then through the toilet window back into the hallway. This is not a very good theory, as there wasn't that much steam from my cooking and it sounds a bit too complicated.
2) my stoner housemate (yes, the same one who thought everything extremely funny) was smoking up in her room and set off the fire alarm, but was too scared/dumb/not bothered to own up to it.
I am going for theory 2 until I get solid proof my housemate does not smoke up (but I am pretty sure she does).
In any case, the firemen were very nice and now that I realise they will be here very soon in case of a real emergency, they are in my good books again.

Words, Words, Words

I have been looking up prices for half of the books I will need for my first term (I still don't know my modules, and even had a dream where I HAD to take popular children's fiction, which deals mainly with Goosebumps and Babysitter's club), and it is all so confuzzling.... It is going to cost me about £150 I think, and thats just one half, and one term! Eeps. Library, here I come!

I Do Not Know What To Wear (Or, Autumn Has Finally Arrived)

I really really really (really) like autumn. Reasons being mainly that it is not summer (I hate summer), I can wear cardies and comfy sweaters again, I don't have to use sunscreen, and i love cold weather.
The only bad thing is that I have no idea what to wear! I mean, I can deal with winter and sort of with summer, but in autumn, the weather can go wherever it likes... So I, gleefully, put on a nice big sweater, and then the sun breaks out! Bad, very bad. So I guess I have to rely in layering... My life is so tough...
Oh, and I live an an old Victorian house now without double glazing, so I already wake up shivering every morning...
Hooray for autumn!
I need some bedsocks.

I Hate Firemen (Well, One Particular Berkshire Fireman Who Shall Remain Unnamed)

But I'm not going to tell you why! Here's the pictures of my new room:







That thing on my coffee table that looks like a football is actually a teapot. Also, I haven't got a bedside table yet but have been promised one, so let's all cross our fingers! Well, on second thought, don't because it might take a while.
And on a side note: I have found out an awful lot of people drive with their music on far too loud for their (and my) own good.

Today's Conversation Between My Hands (Or, Religious Conflicts Of The Manual Kind)

Right Hand: Hey Left, how are you? Palm still hurting?
Left Hand: Hurting, no. Disfigured, yes. I'm well pissed off!
Right Hand: Wow, wow, calm down! What's wrong?
Left Hand: Well, don't you think it would be nice sometimes to be treated just slightly better by Her?
Right Hand: What do you mean? There's nothing wrong with the way She treats us!
Left Hand: Oh no? And what about Right Index Finger, hm? I guess she likes being slammed into a closing drawer? No doubt she enjoys the privilege of developing a black spot and having everything She makes her do hurt?
Right Hand: There's no need to get stroppy, She had just gotten up, She didn't mean to close that drawer on Index!
Left Hand: Whatever. You'd think someone in charge of an entire frikkin' body would be a bit more careful!
Right Hand: Hey, hey, you can't just go around saying things like that! She usually takes really good care of us, She's just a bit nervous about this whole new university thing and having to make sure her room is done and tidy so She can put the pictures online!
Left Hand: How do you figure She takes good care of us, hm? Let's just think about it rationally. One: She makes us type loads and loads without even giving us any kind of reward for it. Two: we always get dry and chapped in the winter and autumn, and She hardly ever remembers to wear gloves or put on handcream until after we're already damaged. Three: She both burns me and slams you in a drawer within 13 hours!
Right Hand: Well, She might not be perfect, but you know what, She tries very hard and I'm sure it is not easy having to look after an entire body.
Left Hand: I don't believe you! She uses you like a slave, I mean, at least I get a break from writing when there's no computer around but for you it just never stops!
Right Hand: Well, maybe I like serving Her like that. Maybe you just don't have enough faith.
Left Hand: Maybe not, but I think it is ridiculous to believe when you don't get anything out of it!
Right Hand: That is so not what faith is about. You just don't get it do you? You don't believe and work hard to get something out of it, you do it as a testament of your faith!
Left Hand: Well, Anyone who treates Their hands like this doesn't deserve my worship.
Right Hand: Fine, whatever, suit yourself. I don't want to listen to this nonsense anymore.
Left Hand: Just telling it like it is... If you can't handle the truth, you'd better not listen anymore!
Right Hand: Well, I won't! So bye!
Left Hand: Fine, bye!

The (Not So) Unfortunate Death Of The Electric Cooker

Curtains open. Visible is a dark stage with a spotlight on a white electric cooker stage left. The rest of the stage is extremely dark, but shapes of other kitchen appliances are visible.
A tall, muscly Man walks in, holding something dark and heavy behind his back which he puts next to the Electric Cooker, out of the audience's line of sight.

Electric Cooker (shivering): W-w-what do you want?
Man (calmly): Electric Cooker, I have come to talk to you. You have a chance to defend yourself against the charges I will lay at your feet. If you cannot defend yourself adequately, I will have to kill you.
Electric Cooker (terrified): B-b-but what have I done to deserve this?
Man: The first charge against you is that of complete uselessness. Is it not true that you will not work unless a main switched is first turned on, hereby misleading The Beautiful Lady into believing that her pan with oil and chopped up onions is being heated when it is not?
Electric Cooker: Well, ehm, I ehm, I... (suddenly inspired) It is just the way my manufacturers made me! And I cannot help what happens when I am not turned on, I am not aware of it!
Man: This is an adequate defence. However, is it not also true that once heated, it is extremely hard to quickly turn down the heat you put out, causing The Beautiful Lady to be stressed about overcooking her food?
Electric Cooker (still inspired by his earlier triumph): This might be true, but The Beautiful Lady could just keep another hob on on a lower heat and be done with it!!
Man: This is an inadequate defence. The Beautiful Lady should not have to make up for your defects, as she is perfect and lovely, and you are not. Moreover, is it not true that the markings on your switches have been rubbed out, making it almost impossible for The Beautiful Lady and her Nearly Perfect Housemates to make out what heat they are cooking their food on?
Electric Cooker (getting a bit fed up with the man now, and forgetting the threat of the thing that is stood by his side): Well, it is hardly my fault that I am so popular my markings are slightly worn. And in any case, if The Beautiful Lady had a bit more patience she could just wait and feel how much heat I am giving off!
Man (severe): This is another inadequate defence. Do not toy with me, Electric Cooker, for I see throught your hastily fabricated excuses. The Beautiful Lady should not have to adapt to your silly whims. Is it not true that because of your worn out markings, The Beautiful Lady accidentally turned on a hob to its highest heat instead of taking the one she was using down one level? Is it not true that this both damaged her spatula and made her burn the palm of her left hand quite painfully?
Electric Cooker (quite desperate now): I-I-I... I do not think this is fair at all! I did not design myself and cannot be held responsible for my actions!!!
Man: This is where you are wrong, Electric Cooker, you can. And you will. I will make sure you suffer for the wrongs you have done to The Beautiful Lady and her Beautiful Left Hand.
Electric Cooker (past caring now): Whatever. Your 'Beautiful Lady' isn't that beautiful anyways, give me a nice-looking washing machine over her any day! And what are you going to do about it, huh? Make me short-circuit or summat?
Man (taking his bucket with water from behind the Electric Cooker): That is exactly what I will do, Electric Cooker.

Electric Cooker makes loud swallowing noise.

Complete blackout. Sounds of bucket of water being emptied. Electric Cooker screams, then is heard to slowly crackle and die. Man walks away, with light gray spotlight following him. When he has left the stage, all is dark.

The Worst Thing About Having To Stand In A Queue For 45 Minutes To Pick Up My Library Card

Was the guy standing in front of me, who insisted on trying to talk to me about really dull things. The topics discussed include (but are not limited to):
- The University he did his undergraduate degree at in London
- The multiple times he applied at Warwick but was rejected (obviously through no fault of his own)
- What on earth I could do with a degree in Children's Literature
- The correct pronounciation of Dutch footballers' names
- Football (after I told him I do not like football)
- How he did 5 A-levels and was obviously very smart
- The exact description/origin of his accent
I wouldn't have minded having a boring conversation with him too much, but he obviously didn't enjoy the conversation either as he kept looking around for more interesting people to talk to (which is hard when you're in a queue - you're kinda limited to two people and the guy in front of him was talking with the friend he was queuing with), and at some points stood with his back towards me while I was still finishing a sentence. I have no idea why he insisted, as we were both so obviously not enjoying talking to each other, and I was even on the phone writing a text to prevent him from talking to me (he had been on the phone himself for quite a while and I was hoping it would last all of the queue), but he kept going on and on... Sigh. At least he does something with economics or finance, so I will never have to see him again!
In the better part of my day I became a member of the Reading Film Theatre (President: Kenneth Branagh) and got home insurance (for much less than I thought it would be) that also covers any accidental damage in my room and for my laptop wherever I take it. So, as of today, I can spill coffee on my books, sit on my glasses, leave my laptop on the bus, and leave the door open but still claim anything stolen on my insurance! Hooray for me and fuck the rest (I am afraid only my mum will get that)
I also just managed to get the neighbour to turn down his music so the excruciatingly annoying thumping has stopped. Let's just hope he remembers and I don't have to remind him daily...

A Quick Note to Say I Am Okay

I am okay!
I am sitting in my new room (which is very big, and includes a sink, two easy chairs and a coffee table as well as the usual stuff) surrounded by mess, but I just wanted to let everyone know I am fine and not as nervous anymore.
I am on free wireless yet again, haha, which is good because I cannot find an internet point in this room. Also don't know whether I will be able to have a phone yet... The only thing they do have is a TV outlet, and that's the only thing I don't need: even if I do buy a small TV, I have a set-top box so don't really need it.
My room is on the ground floor in the front of the house on a reasonably busy road, but at least I have a room so I won't complain.
bye for now!

Gross Mythen: The Queen Mushroom Story (Or, I Was Very Sweaty Today But I Showered So I Am Not Anymore)

This is the mountain I climbed today (at least, the part of it you can climb from the cable cart station which isn't in the picture because I am standing in front of it taking the picture). It is called Gross Mythen, and yes, there is also a smaller one called Klein Mythen next to it. The climb involved a lot of blood, sweat and tears (actually, only sweat but the amounts of it more than made up for the other two) but I made it in 2 hours, and when we got to the top there was a man playing an Alpenhorn:



When we descended, the man was playing the horn above us, and below we could hear the cow bells. This made it an ultimately Swiss experience, and I also realised I don't actually have a fear of heights so that was great! The view was absolutely stunning (but pictures of the view don't work out well so I didn't take any and just enjoyed it) and while walking down I could really look at it at my leisure, and it still only took 1 hour and 15 minutes to get to where the cable cart station was. Damn gravity pulling you down when you dont want it!

And another very nice thing was that when I had just started to descend again, I had sjans from a really cute guy. I don't know how to explain sjans in English, but it's basically when someone looks at you in a way that means they sort of fancy you. And that while I was sweaty! I was less sweaty than him though, having just had a half hour rest whereas he'd been climbing a mountain.

Done with the story of sweat now. It was a good day.

Previous Installments Of Awesome Lady

This is the first one
This is the second one
and yay for me for finding out how to link!

The Importance Of An Alter-Ego (2): The Start Of Awesome Lady

Claire put both her feet firmly on the ground and looked The Prison Guard in the eyes. Inside, she was trembling and terrified, but she knew better than to show her fear. Her opponent, on the other hand, did not expect much of a struggle from the young woman in front of him and just wanted to make her suffer until The Gentleman of Justice would wake up, just in time to see her die.
Claire looked at her father, lying wounded and unconscious on the roadside, and felt an anger rising inside her which made her do something she would never otherwise have done. She looked up at The Prison Guard's face and yelled: 'You will never touch me or my family again!' The Prison Guard, laughing, shot a bolt of electricity at her and for a moment, Claire was powerless. Then, all of a sudden, she felt stronger than ever before and she hit her enemy with a much stronger bolt. The crowd that had gathered was slightly singed, but The Prison Guard, understandably impervious to electricity, was unhurt. He roared with laughter and sent another bolt Claire's way. And another, and again and again until nothing could be seen but a big ball of smoke.
The crowd, which had moved to a safer place to watch the fight, had no more hopes for the nations most beloved superhero's daughter. But inside the smoke, Claire felt something she had never felt before: with every bolt The Prison Guard sent her way, she became stronger and stronger, until finally, she knew she was stronger than both her father and his arch nemesis put together.
When the smoke had cleared, The Prison Guard's smugness disappeared with it. Before him stood not the 19-year-old student he was so eager to torture, but an amazingly beautiful yet frightening young woman. Her entire body glowed with energy, and from her eyes shone a terrifying light. The Prison Guard, realising his mistake but unwilling to admit it, tried to attack her but he was stopped by a kick in the stomach which sent him flying through the air. Claire, able to fly much faster than her enemy could fall, was waiting for him when he landed and launched into a clobbering the likes of which The Prison Guard had never been subjected to.
Completely exhausted, The Prison Guard tried a final time to gather up some energy to electrocute his adversary, but Claire simply waited for him to charge up and then threw him into the newly erected monumental fountain that was the pride of her hometown. The Prison Guard, unable to rid himself of the charge he had meant to kill Claire with, short-circuited and died.
Claire collapsed and was caught by her father, who had woken up just in time to see his arch nemesis die. As The Gentleman of Justice took his exhausted daughter in his arms and flew her to safety, the crowd let out a deafening cheer. 'Wow,' said one of the onlookers, 'the daughter of The Gentleman of Justice really is one Awesome Lady.'

The Importance Of An Alter-Ego (1)

Although they were otherwise very good parents, Mrs Sparkle and The Gentleman of Justice never taught Claire the necessity, for a superhero of her caliber, of an alter-ego. Both Mrs Sparkle, who was a minor superhero (but huge in Germany) whose powers consisted of making evil people (or bathrooms) extremely clean, and The Gentleman of Justice, who, as his name suggests, was a very just and polite superhero who only fought fair fights and never let a bad guy get away, came from normal, non-super families and had never expected to have a superhero daughter. The Gentleman of Justice, who was an enormous star and away from home more times than not, left it to his wife to raise their daughter.
There are a lot of good things to be said about Mrs Sparkle: she loved her child dearly, instilled in her a sense of immaculate cleanliness, and made sure she went to school and bed on time. Claire went to the best schools possible (which were very good schools indeed as her father was basically superhero royalty), but when she discovered her superpowers, of which there were many, no one guided her through the usually long and difficult path to superhero-dom.
And this was how, when she was 19 and ready to go to university, Claire stumbled into her superhero life without knowing the first thing about protecting herself.
While walking to a lecture on a sunny Wednesday morning, Claire noticed a smell. The smell was neither pleasant nor foul, but to Claire it signified something very important. It was the same smell she had smelled every time her father went away for business, and every time her mother decided it was time for a spring cleaning (which was about once a month). It was her superhero danger radar, which at that point was so connected with her family Claire expected her mother to jump out of the bushes with a vacuum cleaner. This didn't happen, but when she went around a corner she saw what had triggered her radar: in the middle of the road stood The Prison Guard, one of the strongest and most evil nemeses of Claire's hometown and The Gentleman of Justice. Stuck in an eternal battle, neither one had ever been able to completely defeat the other, but right now, The Prison Guard had Claire's father in a death grip.
Before Claire knew what she was doing, she screamed out for her father and flew to face the metal-clad master of electrocution. 'Hmmm,' he said, 'So this is the daughter my enemy has been so careful to protect... Let's see how she measures up to her father.' The Gentleman of Justice, before he could even warn Claire or fly her to a safe space, was flung to one side and became unconscious as his head hit a tree.
What followed was a battle of the extremes: Claire, being unused to her powers and used to the fair fights she had seen her father have on the 8 o'clock news, had to use all her resources and strength to stay alive, let alone fight back. Her father, when he regained consciousness, tried to help her, but he soon recognised the immense strength his daughter had and realised his interference would make the fight extremely unbalanced, preventing him from being able to help. So he stood watching, hoping for his daughter to realise her strength in time for her to walk away unscathed.
But something he had never expected happened next...
(To Be Continued)