Thursday, December 04, 2008

Awesome Lady - The Battle of Boredom

Awesome Lady walked into her home and flopped down on her Awesome Sofa. It had been a regular sofa to being with, but after an especially brutal fight, the Fluffinator had had to put some extra stuffing into it, so that now it was the most comfortable, lovely, and, well, Awesome Sofa in the world.
Awesome Lady looked around her and sighed. Her living room was sparkling. She looked behind her into her bedroom, which, too, was sparkling. She looked through the door in front of her to see that her bathroom and kitchen, too, were cleaner than they had ever been. Due to her rather particular upbringing, Awesome Lady's house never had time to grow dirty even when crime-fighting was at its peak, which, incidentally, it wasn't right now. In fact, it hadn' t even come anywhere close to peak-ish. Awesome Lady was bored. So bored she considered, very briefly, 'accidentally' letting one or two notorious bandits free. Of course, her innate sense of justice wouldn't allow her, so she turned on the t.v. and zapped her way through exactly 48 channels of reality shows, sports, rubbish films and weather reports before grunting angrily and turning the t.v. off again.
Awesome Lady lay down and dozed off for a bit, and all of a sudden she found herself dreaming of the stranger she had met after her horrible fight with Shevila. The Fiendess had never showed up again, and although Awesome Lady was generally too busy to worry about anything but enemies that were right in front of her, it had been so quiet lately that her mind had been occupied almost wholly with that very strange night not so long ago. She dreamt now that she was back on the roof of the Cathedral, and she was watching the stranger and the Many-Named Serpentess fight. Their fight was unlike anything she had ever seen before. Awesome Lady had fought terrible fights that were harsh and cruel and made her bring out a savageness she rarely experienced, but she had never witnessed, let alone fought, a battle so beautiful and energetic. Although it was obviously a terrible fight, the beauty/ugliness of the She-Devil and the beauty and nobility of the stranger made a terrifyingly mesmerising match. Their combined energies (for there was no doubt that in their fight, they became an almost inseperable unity) shed a light that hypnotised Awesome Lady, and in spite of her brain calling out her duty to help the tiger-like stranger, she sat down and watched the fight.
After what seemed a century, the two broke apart and Shevila scampered off into the night. The stranger fell down on the floor, and with a cry of distress and worry, Awesome Lady ran to him. She knelt beside him and checked that he was breathing, which he was, lay down next to him and embraced him. They stayed like that for a while, and then the man woke up, smiling. As soon as he saw Awesome Lady, he looked distressed and jumped up. 'You shouldn't be here!' the stranger yelled, pushing an astounded Awesome Lady from his arms. Too surprised to say or do anything, Awesome Lady looked pleadingly at the handsome stranger. 'I don't know how you got her, but you need to leave. This place is not safe, and you shouldn't have come back here. Please, leave now and don't come back!' Awesome Lady tried to speak as she felt herself slowly waking up. She willed herself to keep sleeping, but it was all in vain, and as she woke up she heard the stranger say just a few more words 'Be careful... Your future...'

Monday, May 26, 2008

ANTM Is An Awesome Show

But that is really a side note to let you know what I am watching on tv at the moment, the real news is that I am moving to Holland in three weeks. In fact, three weeks from now I will be living at my mother's, where I will stay two weeks before I move into... a houseboat!!!
I will be living in the 'roef' which is a little extra apartment (for apartment read room) at the front of my aunt and uncle's houseboat. I have seen pictures today and apart from learning that the girl who lives there now is very good at creating mess, I now also know I am going to have a very cute place to live in.
Hopefully I will be able to update you regularly on how everything is going, because it would be nice to have a place where all my lovely friends in the UK and wherever else they live, how my life back in good old Dutchland is going.
Here's the plan:
1) pack
2) get Dougie checked out and get a health certificate
3) move with the help of my stepdad
4) find a job
5) move to the boat!!!
6) come visit the UK lots
Gotta go now, phoning my mother to go through the plans!

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Maybe He Does Exist In Real Life...

I met a man today who had all of the following qualities:

big and muscly (and wearing a rugby top to emphasise it)
longish hair
perfect-looking on a motorbike (in my head, anyway)
very happy and nice
undoubtedly good with children (pelicula!)

and the best thing, his job was an being an undercover policeman (not at a school, tho)

I think I may have found Doug Penhall in the flesh, and I'm in love :)

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

I Have Good Logic (No, Really)

The idea is that as soon as you stop looking for a man (partner, whatever you are into) in your life, you find them.
So here's what I've been doing: I am desperately hoping to get fed up looking (and helping a good deal by going on extremely dull dates), so I can finally meet someone...

The person of good logic, that's me.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

It's Not Easy Being Sort-Of-Grey-ish

She took me aways from my brothers and sisters and put me in a house all of my own. It has see through walls on one side, and I can see her move. Most of the times she is not there and I don't know where she goes, maybe she does not exist those times. It is perfectly possible that she exists solely to feed me and clean my house. My house gets quite dirty, but it is mainly the food's fault. I am tidy and poo in the same place. Except that one time when she put something there to prevent me, I had to poo in a different place that day.
There is water and salad in this house, but no friends I can play with. Every night when she comes to feed me she takes me out first, and when she cleans my house I have to come out, too, and she holds me tight. I want to explore the rest of the world, the grey and white and brown outside my house, but she gets nervous when I do. I don't mind when she picks me up, but I like being in my house better. She is very big and sometimes I am scared.
She talks a lot. I do not understand her, but she doesn't seem to mind. Sometimes she makes the ceiling make noises, and sometimes I like them but sometimes I don't and then I hide behind my bark. The food hides in the bark sometimes, but usually I catch it and eat it before it does.
I hide behind the bark sometimes as well when I don't want her to pick me up, but she is very strong and she picks up the bark and moves it to the other end of my house. It is very warm on the other side of my house, I like it but sometimes I have to hide behind the bark because it is too hot.

She has boxes with food, so I think she is nice, but I am not sure, she might stop at any point and then what will I do?